You would think that Andrew Jackson was giving you his undivided attention, and then you would glance over and notice that he had devoted the last several minutes to making a laborious sketch of an alligator.
“Mr. President!” you would gasp, indignantly.
“I have a bullet lodged inside my body,” he would say. “From killing a man in a duel. A better man than you.” He would resume drawing the alligator.”
when i’m saying bye to my friend
[sees girl reading The Communist Manifesto]
"Ah I love that book. The way he just [clenches fist] manifests all that frickin communism."